Now for the main reason for this post. For the past nearly four months I’ve been dealing with a lot of medical problems. Just last year I found out I had a heart condition that my doctor believes I was born with but wasn’t discovered until, obviously, much later. This wasn’t so bad and managed easily enough with meds, but the pills made me feel terrible and if I didn’t take them I’d start to feel worse.

Come July (I believe it was right after I returned from the break I took from translating), I ran out of pills for almost a month due to issues with my former doctor. I felt terrible and it was around this time that I noticed a pain in my left knee. It constantly felt like it was going to give out on me.

As the days passed, this pain developed into weakness that soon spread throughout both of my legs. Just walking from my car into work had my legs feeling like jelly. I actually felt a sense of deja vu and was reminded of when I’d run the mile in track during high school. Except, I was now getting this feeling from walking fifty feet. I physically couldn’t walk up a flight of stairs as my legs no longer had the strength to get me to the top.

This was all in the first month.

I was finally able to get in to see a new doctor and he, at first, suspected I had West Nile Virus. After two tests for this, he still couldn’t definitively say that was the cause. The tests said I had the antibody but didn’t detect the actual virus. So a couple more doctor visits, some more meds, hundreds of dollars in medical bills, my knee actually giving out on me when I was walking downstairs, and we weren’t any closer to finding out what was wrong with me.

I will say at this point, some strength had returned to my legs and overall I was feeling a bit better, but I was (and still am) far from being 100%.

He recommended me to a specialist who I went to see in early October. Unfortunately, this didn’t really help anything either. I was given samples of this drug that was meant to be injected into me. I was on this for a month with some terrible side effects before I was taken off of them as nothing had improved. I returned to my family doctor due to the bills from the specialist being +$1000 per visit even with my insurance.

And that pretty much brings us to today. All of this has brought on a slew of other issues which has greatly affected me mentally. I’ve started on antidepressants for the first time after a recommendation from my doctor, and I’ve caused a lot of stress and worry with my family and loved ones. Which I think is what I hate most about all of this.

I don’t know why I’ve gone on so long about this. I just feel like I owe an explanation to those that are disappointed about me dropping OISJS. It’s not the most popular series but I know over a thousand people read it every month. I hate when I disappoint a single person so disappointing that many people just leaves a pit in my stomach.

But I know that I’m already straining myself as it is just trying to continue working to pay off bills and I can’t keep up with my current workload. I may come back to the series if nobody else has picked it up, but I can’t say when that will be.

I’m sorry if you’re disappointed. It’s hard to sound sincere through text but I truly am.

And one final note. Someone recommended that I ask for donations to help pay off bills. I won’t be doing this. I have insurance and earn decent money. If you want to donate to someone who needs it, I recommend you find a good charity. If I receive any donations for this, I’ll be grateful for your intentions, but I will promptly refund them.

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